I am pictured below with Senator Klobuchar and my friend Sigrid. Sigrid is a single mom to a beautiful 3 year old daugther from China (who looks exactly like Lily). We met on a walk one day near my old house in Brooklyn Center. She is currently waiting for a baby girl (born last March) from Guatemala (who does NOT look exactly like Willow. Whew!).
I was able to meet with Senator Klobuchar and a large group of parents waiting to adopt from Vietnam and Guatemala today. There is absolutely nothing the American Government can or should do to help us right now, but the Senator assured Guatemala parents that things will be OK. She met with the President Colom and his wife (who is going to play an active role in Guatemalan adoptions) last week and was assured that things in PGN will pick up speed in the coming weeks. I am always eager to participate in these discussions in case I need help at some point and to share Willow's story with anyone willing to listen. I still believe the stall at PGN is necessary right now and I am not arrogant enough to think that we Americans should be given any special treatment. I'd like to believe Willow deserves it, but the truth is that this picture is bigger than either of us.

I was reminded today that this battle is not about finding babies for families, but finding families for babies. This baby has found her family and that is what we are fighting to protect. With all due to respect to the government officials in Guatemala: This baby has found her family and all potential law changes should honor that above all else! Can I just write it one more time, dear reader? THIS BABY HAS FOUND HER FAMILY!

PGN not releasing files

This sign is posted on the PGN window where attorneys go to collect files once they have been approved and released. It's basically saying that they are not releasing any files at this time regardless of approval. There are several issues going on right now that may or may not be causing this:

1. Four Guatemalan women are on a hunger strike on the steps of the National Palace of Culture in Guatemala city. You can read the article in English at http://guatadopt.com/discussions/index.php?topic=6611.0 . They assure officials that their babies were stolen in 2006 and they have reason to believe they were given up for adoption. They want all files from 2006-present looked through to help find their babies.
2. The new Attorney General wants to clean up corruption within PGN and the attorneys who have corrupted the system. They are calling for a complete audit of all files currently in PGN to find irregularities and prosecute those who have broken the law.

I feel calm! If a few more months without my baby home assures me and Willow forever that her relinquishment and adoption were completed with love and integrity, that is a price I can not afford to resent. My hope is that the new people in authority in Guatemala have the wisdom to prosecute the offenders quickly so that the rest of the cases can begin to move again.

I believe my attorney should receive my letter either late this week or early next week and I will be ready to re-enter PGN at that time. They are accepting files - just not releasing them.

Willow's birth mother has been interviewed twice already, assuring officials that she willingly gave up this baby. One DNA test has been completed and another will be performed before I bring Willow home. There is little doubt that my own case is squeaky clean, but I would never, ever want to rush through at another mother's loss!

Good News/Bad News

Good News:

• I am done with minor's. When I am resubmitted to PGN I will follow the normal review process like everyone else.
• My letter required for the kick out is on its way to Guatemala. They should receive it sometime this week. As soon as my attorney gets my file reorganized I'll be ready to get resubmitted.
• President Bush is meeting with Guatemala's president Colom this week, on Tuesday. Perhaps the topic of adoption will come up...

Bad News:

• The attorney general of Guatemala has been fired and all adoptions are frozen. Again. Even files that have been approved are not being released at this time.
• The head of PGN, Barrios, is potentially being fired so there is talk that all files will be audited to look for irregularities and unnecessary delays being made. This would take weeks or months, during which time no files (babies) would be released. Hopefully I'll hear more this week about whether or not this will happen.

Reason for kick out

I received an email at work on Friday morning that the reason I was kicked out is because PGN wants a letter stating that I am not gay (because I'm single). So I wrote a letter, got it notarized during lunch hour, my parents picked it up and brought it to the secretary of state's office to get a state seal (yes, a state seal on my "not gay" letter). After work I brought it to UPS to overnight it to a courier who will bring it to the Guatemala consulate's office in Chicago (to authenticate my "not gay" letter) and overnight it back to Bethany, so they can get it to Guatemala right away. I just want to get back "IN" PGN as soon as possible! I still haven't heard if I'm done with the minor's part, but I'm hoping to hear about that on Monday. My prayer is that when I am resubmitted I will be able to bypass minors because they've completed the birth mother interview (and investigation).

Can you imagine anyone believing there are unethical adoptions in Guatemala? They are going through every single file with a fine tooth comb! This kick out is absurd (couldn't I just lie either way), however it does demonstrate that government officials are demanding all adoption laws are followed. There will no doubt when Willow comes home that everything was ethical in her relinquishment and adoption.

I remain unusually calm. I find myself hearing Sandra's words: All will be well. That and the phrase that got me through as I waited for Lily: "It'll be fine in the end. If it's not fine, it's not the end."

Kicked out of PGN

I called PGN on Monday, and found out that we were kicked out of PGN on April 9th. Sandra can't tell me anything about the legal part of Willow's case, so I have to wait to hear the details from my agency, which often takes weeks. I'm hoping it's something that can be fixed quickly so I get back in right away. Usually people are kicked out for tiny errors such as misspellings or papers out of order according to the index provided by the attorney, etc. Occassionally it involves an error on a birth certificate (of the baby or the birth parent(s)), which can take weeks or months to replace. When I am resubmitted to the PGN, I go back to the beginning at the bottom of the pile and wait to hear if I'm approved or kicked out again. Often families are kicked out three or more times.

I got an email from Sandra today telling me that Pili is getting more active every day. She walks by herself now, she loves the bath and hates getting out, she loves to dance and when they sit her down she jumps up and dances again. When they take her to the store she wants to touch everything and when she sees kids playing she wants to play with them. She loves to play with the little girl in the picture (Lucia) and they run through the house together shouting and laughing. She wanted to eat all of the cotton candy in that picture, and "Thus she did." Also, they have 2 dogs and Willow loves them.

And this sentence deserves a paragraph all to itself. It actually deserves its own blog, but this will have to do: I asked Sandra where Willow sleeps - if she has a crib. She told me that Pili sleeps with Veronica at night and does not have her own "cradle".

I emailed her that I have felt unusually calm the last few days. She responded that it is God giving me this "serenity" to assure me that "all will turn out well." She said "Pili is going to arrive home, perhaps not at the moment that you expected but at the moment that has to be." Also "Be relaxed. Trust in God and in which is being done for your case and you will see that all will turn out well."

Keeping my mind off Willow

Lily started gymnastics and it's adorable! Yaya, Grace, Tate, Grammy, Papa, and King (as Lily has always called my gramma King) all came to see her first practice tonight. She was so proud to see them all there to cheer her on!

And my girl breaks out the "bridge" on the first night. Ouch!

Gimme an L. Gimme an I. Gimme another L. Gimmy a Y. Go Lily go!

And, lastly, one of our favorite activities this spring. The deck needs to be stripped and stained, but in the mean time Lily LOVES to peel the paint with a scraper. She, seriously, begs me to let her go out there and try to get "BIG HUGE" pieces of paint off. It's a bribe sometimes - I can get her to do almost anything quickly if she gets to peel paint afterwards. I'm sure the neighbors love me right now. Shades curtesty of Beam. Thanks, Beam!

No news is bad news and it drives me crazy!

I've been in PGN for just over a month and the birth mother still hasn't been interviewed. I called on Monday, April 7th and will call again next Monday. Now that my agency told Sandra not to share info with me, I'm pretty much in the dark except for the often week old information I get when I can get through to PGN. Once the birth mother is interviewed, I still have a minimum of several weeks in PGN, so the odds of getting out before school are getting pretty slim. Thankfully I have Lily to keep me busy and distracted. I'm posting pictures of Willow's room since I haven't received any news pictures in about week and a half (hear the moping in that?).